SassyBlonde

So, D totally helped me solve a lifelong question last night.

When I was in school, I had to read The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster. In it, there's a point where the main character passes through a market in Dictionopolis where letters are sold after being grown in orchards, and descriptions of a few of the letters' tastes soon follow.

I read Tollbooth when I was about twelve, and ever since I've wondered what all the letters would taste like. Lying in bed last night reading, I explained the question to D, who promptly opened a lively discussion with me about the issue.

Me: Q is so not cardamom. You totally pulled that out of your ass.
...
D: Q is totally garlic because it never goes out on its own and is better with other things. And when you use it on its own it's totally garish.
...
D: See, G is totally banana-- it goes with H (wheat bread) and U (honey), and if you spell dough it totally makes a peanut butter and banana sandwich!
Me: But O is mayonnaise...
Together: Eeeew.
Me: And yet, Elvis would probably approve.

• A: cucumber (crispy and yet somewhat nondescript but with a nice flavor)
• B: peach (juicy-- I admit, this one got thrown here because peach had to be in it somewhere)
• C: apple
• D: peanut butter (it always sort of hangs in the roof of my mouth)
• E: butter cookie (crispy and goes with everything, but can be soft and a good complement)
• F: marshmallow
• G: banana
• H: wheat bread (a soft complement to other letters: filler with decent stand-on your own vagueness: think beige, peeps.)
• I: pineapple
• J: celery
• K: lettuce (crispy with lots of crunch, but not a lot of independent taste)
• L: water with lemon (fluid and liquid, but not quite flavorless)
• M: filet mignon
• N: cream cheese
• O: mayonnaise (a little or a lot, it's good with other things but a little senseless on its own)
• P: sugar snap peas
• Q: garlic (stated above)
• R: strawberries
• S: soda water (good to dilute the more serious stuff down, makes a good combination with pretty much everything else)
• T: chicken (it's sort of the baseline for everything)
• U: honey
• V: onion
• W: orange jello
• X: sawdust (of course)
• Y: tomato
• Z: Pop Rocks (obviously.)