SassyBlonde

Three words for you people: Grilled. Cheese. Sandwiches.

D and I went to the Montgomery County Fair tonight, to ogle the livestock and the other oglers and partake of that most expensive nasty indulgence-- fair food. And let me tell you, it was gooooooooooood.

For some reason I've never really indulged in fair food-- we've always just sort of shared a sandwich and gone to peek at the bunnies, but this year we decided to give it an all-around go: one last hurrah (I seem to be doing a lot of those) before we beat this diet question back for good. I think what's always put me off was the price-- nothing there sells for less than two dollars (sodas and water) and usually more like six or seven (sandwiches, desserts.) I'm not going to say how much money we spent, but it was considerable, even if it was mostly worth it. We avoided all of the cheaper, chintzier items like pizza and Chinese chicken on a stick (well, almost) and tried to stick to more traditional fair offerings, which pretty much left us with fried everything. So you don't have to make the same trial-and-error choices, here's the rundown:

• Corn Dog: Oh my sweet holy Lord, I can truly now say there is nothing like a county fair corn dog. It was deep-fried to perfection and toasty hot, slathered with mustard. And a fair bargain at $3. Probably my second favorite thing of the night.
• Crab Dawg: An overpriced ($6) crab cake wrapped up like an egg roll. Tasty, definitely, but seriously sad for the price. Skip it.
• Fresh Grilled Cheese Sandwich: Oh God, save us lactards from the cheese house-- the grilled cheese sandwiches are made with fresh cheese and lovingly hand-grilled by someone's grandma using real butter and awesome cheap white bread. D and I almost fought over the last bite. A complete and utter steal at $3.50 or 2/$5. Run, do not walk.
• Pit Beef Sandwich: Tasty, but pricey at $6.50. Great with horseradish and mustard, but I could live without it. Definitely loses to the grilled cheese hands-down.
• Deep-Fried Oreos: People, this has to be the greatest opinion upset of all time. Ever since I heard about these things, I've been making fun of them non-stop. I mean, deep fry an Oreo, which as we know is basically Crisco and sugar? It always sort of seemed like overkill in theory. In practice though, these weren't just good, they were life-changing. Not that I'm going to go out and eat them every day, but I think they've just earned themselves a new fan. They were hot as hell, but melted in my mouth with just the right amount of crunch from the tasty outer coating of batter, and the cookies had softened inside so that they just dissolved in your mouth. The $5 price tag is a little daunting, but they totally beat the tar out of the standard funnel cake, and for six specimens of deep-fried perfection I think it's entirely reasonable.

Of course, the food wasn't the only highlight: witness the above photo of a sheep in Fran Drescher's clothing. So hilarious. And my favorite thing of all to do: go scope out the chickens in all of their feathery glory. You never realize how insane some of those birds can look until you see a Polish up close. My favorites, of course, are always the tiny bantams, particularly the Dutch Bantam and Barred Plymouth Rocks. Someday I'd love to have a flock of Barred Rocks for eggs, but not here and not now. (Just think of how they' work my garden!!! Okay, calming down now.)

And there's always the people watching, and the pig races. There were a lot of corn-fed country boys walking around, too, which never hurts, and they got all fired up when it was time for the monster truck show. (At $12 a ticket, we watched what action we could see between the horse barn and the fence.) All in all, a good time all around, and for only... wait a minute! Dammit!

When did the county fair get so expensive? Between admission ($8 per), parking ($5), and food (you do the math), we spent about FIFTY DOLLARS. *sigh* Oh for the good old days.

Ah well, at least I got to see some goat-on-goat action for my money. Oy.