SassyBlonde

One of the beauties of going on tour with a bunch of friends is the amount of verbal gems you come away with by the end of the trip. Here, for your enjoyment, are some of ours (and if you don't know, I'm not explaining). Yes, there are over thirty, but who can choose? Those of you wonderful people frm the group who are reading this-- if I've left any out, click here and leave them in the Comment section. Rock out.

“THOSE are not hers.”

“People paid thousands of dollars for these tickets…”
“Big daddy”
“Rock star!”
“I am local people. You come have tea with me?"
“Where’s Danny?”
“What is that smell?”
“Get them ALL out of here! Her too! I am TRYING to run a rehearsal!”
“I have a bowing change,”
“Dun-didda-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-didda-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun…”
“Please!”
"Why the hell am I so hungry all the time? It seems like half and hour after I eat I... oh. Right. It's Chinese food."
“When are we leaving again?”
“And yet… he’s hot-- I’d do him.”
(To the tune of Come On Over)"I itch, I scratch, 'cause I just shaved my snatch..."
“I have fabulous hair.”
“I love that there are so many mirrors in this elevator.” ”Yeah—so you can look at your hair.”
“Happy ending?”
“Travel buddy!”
“Fuck these people. Fuck ‘em.”
"And... scene."
“Seems like one of you married girls could help a single brother out.”
“I just want to know what it is I’m putting in my mouth in the first place.”
“I’d say a third of my shoes never leave the bedroom.”
“Does it have snake in it?”
"And... scene."
“Lookee lookee!”
“Hello shopping lady, come smell my wood!”
“You beautiful. Yes?"
“GucciPradaBagWatchArtComeLookeeVeryGoodPriceHello?”
“You’re from Birmingham and you’re talking to me?”
“With love and cellos,”
“So what’s the groove for today?”
“What exactly IS the use of a man’s room attendant? I mean, has any guy ever REALLY looked over at this guy and said ‘Excuse me, could you hold this for me for a minute?“
“And… diminuendo.”
“Look honey, I am not your girlfriend, I am not your bitch, and I am not your mother-- I don’t want to sit with you and I definitely don’t want to hear about your hemorrhoids.”
“One more beer-- fist in mouth.”
“Holy thong, Batman!”
“Dances with curves”
“There is just an ambient layer of schmutz on this whole country.”
"After all, all it really takes to make her happy when I get home is a fat check, a silk dress, and a woody."
"Bu yao motherfucker."