SassyBlonde

I am a fan of bathroom fans. It's going to be the first thing I check on/install when we finally buy a house, because without the fan you can hear things that are better left unshared. Sometimes there's just not enough space in your life for the images such ambient noise brings, but trust your really good friends to be able to talk about them with you.

Like, for instance, when you have a date over to your apartment. The Muse and I were having dinner tonight, and recapping her recent date with the Hot Doctor. Now, let's be clear, any mention of the HD makes her giddy, so seeing her hop up and down in her Vaccaro's booth and squeak "He used my bathroom!" was nothing new.

"Well at least it was clean," I said, knowing how spic-and-span her place was for his first visit.

"Yeah, but I could hear it. Do you know what kind of image that causes to jump into my mind? I think that's one of those things women think about, but never say out loud. When you hear a guy going to the bathroom, automatically you get 'the image' in your head," whereupon we start laughing hysterically and the Muse drops her cannoli back onto her plate with a loud expletive, making the coiffed and proper lady at the next table give her a look. "Not exactly proper (for a Southern God-fearing girl) to be thinking about on the first date!"

"Oh, stop," I gasp laboredly. "Too much food-- no more laughing-- I'm gonna ralph! And now I have the image in my head." Further gales of laughter.

"Hey!" she says, "You're a married lady!" giving me that stop-thinking-about-it-he's-my-hottie look.

"Yeah," I giggle. "But I've seen my version-- that's why I'm laughing!" At this point, the lady is glaring at us nonstop as we howl breathlessly.